Deep Overstock Goes Public

For immediate releaseApril 1, 2021

Portland, OR – Independent book publisher Deep Overstock Publishing, LLC, decided to go public in the early morning of Thursday April 1st, 2021. After seeing the success of the stock market for companies like Gamestop and AMC, Deep Overstock wanted to a piece of the pie.

Stock is literally part of our name,” said DOO Head (Deep Overstock Officer Head) Mickey Collins. “We were already halfway there.” He then began to hum the song, “Livin’ on a Prayer” by Jon Bon Jovi.

Thus, $DOS as born. As you can see from the chart provided by Collins (below), things are going up.

“I don’t really know what comes next,” continued Collins. “I rang a bell this morning and then I started selling shorts, ones that don’t fit me anymore. I have quite a lot of shorts that are too small. This COVID quarantine has really added on a few pounds.”

When asked what he plans to do with his newfound wealth, Collins had this to say: “We’re looking to open up a physical bookstore sort of like how Amazon did it. All of our books will be up in overstock though, out of reach of customers. We’ll have ladders that can get you halfway up the shelf, but not all the way. There’ll be one ladder that can reach the books, that is labeled for employee use only, but there won’t be any employees. Any non-employee using the employee ladder will be immediately banned from the store.”

Pressed to answer how this will be a good business model, Collins shrugged and said, “I like the overstock.” He then continued to sing “Livin’ on a Prayer” off-key.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s