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Secret aaaagent man–A tee.Secret aaaaagent man–A tee.They’ve given you some blubberAnd taken away your mane.    –Johnny Estuaries From his waterfront office, located within the mangroves and womangroves of Kissimmeeyoufool, Florida, Secret Agent Manatee logged into his laptop. A new episode of his favorite whalepodcast, Last Night Spumes Raydio had been postedContinue Reading

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No harmful bacteria detected. PH level is within the acceptable range. Nitrates, sulfates, iron and manganese levels are stable. Water analysis complete: drinkable. Examination phase cleared, proceed with mission. It has been 4625 days since I was placed to guard this post, make daily water analysis, and await further instructions.Continue Reading

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The Light Tower There is an immense light on immense legs. It is as if the bulb of a lighthouse were rolled onto the legs of a water tower. As men lose their hair and graduate high school, they ascend the ladder up the tower. They got a woman pregnant,Continue Reading

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Our town’s favorite men were the men in blue jumpsuits who walked into the forest then down into the collider. The collider was a good way’s underground. It went under the forest, then under our town. We prayed for life to our collider, on our knees beside our beds. OurContinue Reading

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A sight upon a site. The hollow beacon stood atop Little Brewster with its majestic gaze. Guiding wayward seafarers from cracking their hull into oblivion. A 12-sided Fresnel lens commanded safe passage to calmer shores, and all at the behest of David Warren, the man who manned this remarkable wonder.Continue Reading

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E.T. Starmann is a pulp fanatic. Although he may not be a professional bookseller or librarian, he is a long-time Weird Tales, Amazing Stories, AllStory collector. A Portland native, E.T. has spent countless hours in the Gold Room nook at Powell’s, pouring through the latest pulp rack covers. E.T.’s workContinue Reading

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There was no delay in my work. The lathe machines were pumping. I could not get them to stop, no matter how much I begged them. There had never been such demand.  The machines of our street pumped into the night. The air above the tarmac was a shimmering metalContinue Reading