The Kerskiffet Sourhisk Dictionary of Magical Heilungery – Jonathan van Belle

(For Maria Franz)

A brief note of introduction is due for this small sample of my larger magical dictionary. There is a perspective, attainable by you, in which, or out of which, reality shines sublimely. But what do I mean, exactly? You’ve heard it said “Judge not, lest you be judged.” I say, simply, “Judge not.” Certainly, you will be judged, so what then? Will you now judge, having been judged yourself, perhaps even damned? But what do I mean by this, more precisely? A tale might clarify: There once was an old, bedridden man who lived alone in a small house with a giant crow, some sixteen feet high. This giant crow fed the sickly man like it would feed its own nestlings. Yet, unbeknownst to the man, the giant crow more often than not ate human corpses it had located at various outlying graveyards; this bird had fed the man that regurgitant; the flavor was masked, even made delectable, by the bird’s digestive fluids. In summary, if you have the habit of looking at the feet of the homeless, this dictionary is for you. But a warning to you: your teeth may become sea glass and your tongue, your precious tongue, a war-tongue!

Dodklipse: n. When persons randomly fade away. Without warning, without reason, they turn semi-transparent, then (in a span of only ten seconds) they grow fully transparent until they totally disappear. There are only ten seconds to realize anything, do anything, say anything. No one knows why it happens, nor why it happens to some and not others. They just fade translucent and vanish. At any moment, anyone may vanish, it is assumed. Some who are missing may be just such cases of vanishment. It is assumed that vanishment means death. A husband wakes to an empty bed. A woman screams to her sister in the next room over, desperate with terror and choked with wishes to stay. It is over in ten seconds.

Eggudru: n. Minor deity of gluttony (opposite of deity Igdorbu). Ate his own feces when food was unavailable; developed a taste for it, and now survives off his ever-recycling feces Someone who is “full of shit” or “bullshitting” may be referred to as “Eggudru.” When you bullshit, you are said to have “a mouth like Eggudru.” Bullshitting itself is called “Eggudru’s feast.”

Frolly: n. A specific ceremonial funeral dance. In a Frolly, the body is hoisted from the tusks of the large elephant-like Gottemdob so that it dangles slightly above the ground (its toes an inch from the dust), and the funeral-goers each have a brief two-partner dance with the body. An animal trainer ensures that the Gottemdob moves so that the body moves gracefully with each funeral dancer.

Gopovogos: A gigantic seashell, like a lace murex shell, used as a communal space in Joya Lahssa, in Koki-pomgo. An aviary of hummingbirds fly inside, feeding those inside a magical nectar; one purses one’s lips as if to kiss, and they come, hover near one’s lips, and serve one a little serving of the nectar.

Gysskl: A white cacti in southern Urtunoq. For certain species, eating the dry grey flesh of the Gysskl cacti gives the eater a pheromone-like scent that allows the eater to bond with and ride a vungfreysh (see entry on “vungfreysh”), but only while the pheromone-like scent is present; as soon as the scent dips below a certain threshold, the rider is in danger of being killed by the vungfreysh. Frequent vungfreysh riders must eat gysskl as part of every meal, though it tastes “as rancid as a pargantra’s blavvort.”

Kahlyrot: A nine-bladed urumi sword whose whip-like steel blades have two magical properties: (1) They pass harmlessly through the wielder, i.e., do not slice the wielder; (2) they can only be seen by the wielder, i.e., are invisible to all others.

Kolpahma: Traditional Joya Lahssa “sacred magic” spaces: turf pit-houses with rib-like roof beams of orogilla wood thatched with pink gullip palms and daubed with a baby blue clay. The orogilla’s peppery aroma fills the interior.

Kulu: (Native to Koki-pomgo) An orange-colored, banana-shaped fruit with seeds that are neon pink and shaped like crescent moons. Kulu is fruit of the Kulu Vine. Kulu seeds are entheogenic.

Mare Silentii: (Sea of Silence) A sea without wind, high salinity, and only dull gray water.

Snow-swaddled: slang. Asleep in somnosurrogacy; “snow” due to the white blindfold.

Somnods (aka Somnosurrogates): Those who “don the ivory” (white blindfolds) and do others’ sleeping for them (called “somnosurrogacy”).

Uklowen: An apothecary with the ability to shrink people to the size of mosquitos and imprison these helpless people in a chamber inside of his own body (in his thigh near his genitalia).

Voll Godders: Religious self-cannibals. They ingest a chemical (via the glands of an amphibious creature) that stimulates a benign tumescent growth. They harvest their tumescent growths, cook them with other religiously prescribed ingredients, and eat the stuff as a high ritual, called Gom.

Vungfreysh: A tyrannosaurus-like creature in Urtunoq. Two-headed. Covered in white fur. Similar to an electric eel. The vungfreysh is constituted of powerful electrogenic tissues. It spits lightning as a dragon spits fire. Vungfreysh like the taste of yiskiv (see entry on “yiskiv”). One can ride Vungfreysh under two conditions: One must eat gysskl (see entry on “gysskl”) and one must wear a “drogdek” (a body suit made of deklornatrag hide) to protect from the vungfreysh’s electrical currents.

Vypiofrike: an all-white plant that looks and acts like kudzu vine. Vypiofrike, which Grows in various parts of Qohellonth, is used as wreaths for somnosurrogacy (see entry on “somnods”).

Yiskiv: n. (Native of Urtunoq) A farmed animal, used for its blue milk, turquoise fur, and fatty meat.

Zuvuq: (Native to northern Nolvisk) A black, lantern-shaped fruit on a shrub with night-blooming black blossoms. Zuvuq is a powerful opioid whose black sap tastes like “the permafrosts of Yoqrin Shoro.”

So, lick, lick the zuvuq,
and for god-color, add kulu;
and don the ivory, forever,
for all dodklipse in time,
and all are ghosts from their frolly severed

Jonathan van Belle is the author of Zenithism (2021) from Deep Overstock Publishing, Editor-in-Chief at Z-Sky (zsky.org), a Content Creator at Outlier.org, and a fan of mallsoft music. You can find his cardboard cutout at www.jonathanvanbelle.com.

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